Who is in your pool?

 

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What is the fastest way to greatly increase the quality of your life?

 

Jesus?…. ok, maybe, but still not quite as fast as what I am thinking of.

 

The quality of our friends and the amount of time we allow them to influence us is a premium to how well our life runs and how much we enjoy it! 

 

We think of dating like fishing… if you fish in a mud hole you will catch bullheads. If you fish in a sparkling stream you will catch rainbow trout. Where are you fishing… now today is not about dating or marriage, but it kind of is. Its about relationships… more specifically mens relationships, you could even call them mentors… but maybe that is too formal.

 

Men are lonely. 

Men want more connection.

Men want networks and insight.

Men want friends who are looked up to.

Men want friends who are Godly and are quick with a word from God.

 

So here is a question: Right now, this very second, what is the pool you are fishing in for friends.

  -  Work….? Good pool? Bad pool? Stagnant pool?

  -  Church? Are you deep enough into that pool with bible studies, ministry, serving, small groups?

  - How much time do you take for fishing… I like UFC fights, but not for what you might think. 

Its easy to get men to come over to the house to watch a UFC fight and eat pizza and wings and drink root beer… Men are relaxed, easy to get to know and I am mentally picking who I want to try to spend more time with. Im fishing! I have had the opportunity to speak at some entrepreneurial events, some for dentists, business owners, chiropractors etc… these are a great pool in which to fish from. I still like church the best. 

 

Much like in marriage and dating…

Contacts create companionship, companionship creates commitment, that commitment creates our character.

 

Where are you setting up shop for contacts.

This past year I paid $500 a session to meet with a mentor… I was one of about 200 people. I continue to get more from the other 200 than from just the mentor. .. and he is awesome, great. But the pool was far more valuable at $500 than the fishing coach. and that coach was Patrick Bet David, so you know he is no slouch. So here is another great point… the friends I choose will be the lifeguard at the pool that I continue to choose from. What do I mean… of course I am going to meet amazing people hanging out with PBD because he is amazing and it costs me something. 

 

When we talk about the influence of friends… we skip that first part of the process… friends come from the pool we fish from. People who date from the bar scene typically live a marriage that feels like it has bars on it. People who date from apps have a little better chance.. but again that app is set up for “what I want”.

 

People who get into groups that are about serving, and bettering oneself and ministry, entrepreneurial and bettering the world … they typically marry those who want to be more like Jesus… (and who doesn’t want to be married to Jesus) who want to better other relationships, better friends, better mankind etc… Those are the friends you want… so make sure you are fishing in the right pool.