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October 30th Clueless couples in Covid

Dependent, independent or Codependent? Which is right, wrong are there differences to a healthy marriage? 

DO YOU KNOW HOW TO BEST FIX YOUR MARRIAGE OR MAKE IT BETTER? It’s not what you think. You must first make yourself better… but how? Come find out!

 

 

Bill Fong 

 

Aside from bowling, Bill Fong hasn’t had a lot of success in life. His Chinese mother demanded perfection, but he was a C student. He never finished college, he divorced young, and he never made a lot of money. By his own account, his parents didn’t like him much. As a bowler, his average in the high 230s means he’s probably better than anyone you know. But he’s still only tied as the 15th best bowler in Plano’s most competitive league. Almost nothing in life has gone according to plan.

He likes to say he got his approach to bowling from the hard-hitting alleys in his native Chicago, where he went to high school with Michelle Obama. He was one of the few kids from Chinatown interested in bowling at the time. Despite his strict mother and the fact that his friends were all on the honor roll, little William preferred sports. He dreamed of being a professional athlete one day. He wasn’t big—too short for basketball, too slender for football—but he’d run up and down the block as a boy, racing imaginary friends.

When Fong was young, his parents divorced. He remembers the man who would become his stepdad taking his mom out on dates to a local bowling alley, where they could bring the kids. He noticed that when he was bowling, he wasn’t thinking about whatever was going on behind him. His mind could focus on the ball, the lane, the pins—and the rest of the world would disappear. He had never been captivated by anything like that.

 

In high school he read book after book on bowling… he studied it and began to get better than most. But when he got married his wife said “grow up” and get a real job. So he quit golf, started cutting hair and took ten years to master golf… he didn’t master it. After 10 years he quit it…

He decided bowling was a comfort to him so he started going to the lanes a few times a week and started back up where he left off pretty quickly… Now he was still an above average bowler… but not the king by any means… until that one night in January 2010. 

He rolled his first 6 frames… all strikes… not totally unusual for him… it had happened many times…

He finished out that game a perfect 300. He started his second game… now there is something you should know about bowling the best of the best are measured by bowling 3 games of 300. That makes you world famous…

So his second game he had a few close calls… but they all fell and it was his second 300 game. As he started his 3rd game he thought he felt the pressure building. He was sweating, tightness in his chest, a little short bursts of panic… but he held the course… the last 6 frames the whole bowling alley came to stand and watch. with each strike close to his 300 they went wild… until his final frame. Bill thought this is it, this is what will change my life… I can start a pro tour, I can get some sponsors, I will now be esteemed and admired, I will prove my parents wrong…

And he let that last ball fly down the lane… It looked absolutely perfect just like every other throw… the pins exploded and everyone froze as they watched the #10 pin wobble, wobble and then regain its balance and stay standing… total silence. Fong literally collapsed only to be held by some of his friends…

He went home, feeling drained, nauseas and numb… he threw up in the bathroom and felt the room spinning…he  realized he was having a stroke.

Rushed to the hospital and after tests and heart surgery the doctor told Bill that if he had thrown a strike on that last frame he surely would have died from the adrenaline that would have hit him… and in fact the miss and the dramatic drop in energy and heartbreak kept him from dying.

 

What was meant for bad actually saved his life. 

 

 

 

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. – Romans 8:28 (NIV)

 

The Living Bible translation words it this way: “And we know that all that happens to us is working for our good if we love God and are fitting into his plans.”

 

First, He works for “the good of those who love Him.” If you love God, you can trust that He is working for your good. 

 

But what does Good mean? Good throughout scripture implies completion. So he is not working just on OUR good… my good might be a bigger house, a faster car more money a vacation in the hamptons… 

But God is working for us to be completed in him. That we are complete in his work, his call his mission and his power and faith. 

 

Second, He works for “those who are called according to His purpose.” Here is a thought…  you do realize that following God entails submitting to His purpose for you? You have been called by Him for a purpose that He holds for your life.

these two qualifiers–loving God and experiencing His call–are actually one thought, one action. Those who love God are called according to His purpose. 

Being called according to God’s purpose also reminds us what “our good” actually is. It’s not our comfort or worldly success. It’s the furthering of His purpose through us.